Dead eye.  One of the biggest things I notice about all CGI movies are theeyes. They’re dead.

James Cameron has solved that by using motion capture to specifically record the actors’ emotions from the eyes.

But I’m not here to talk about how he made it.  Mostly because it’s beyond me.  I only understand the reasoning behind it like solving dead eye.  Sounds like a disease.

So here’s a list of what I truly loved about the movie as a whole:

• No over usage of CGI as a replacement for story.
• No over usage of 3-D.  In acting there’s a fourth wall, the wall removed so the audience can watch.  Rule is to never break the fourth wall.  But many 3-D movies do because it’s 3-D.
• All of the actors did an incredible job.
• It didn’t feel very heavily directed.
• Clear plot, clear themes, clear characters types.
• And most important of all, there was a good story.

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I don’t know if it’s because I’ve been so obsessed with story and writing for the past few years, but there were some parts that were predictable, only because the story required it.  Certain key supporting characters died, certain story elements had to happen to drive the plot, the theme and climax. The ending was definitely predictable, and I mean the ending after the climax.  But what was strange was I wanted that ending.  I desired it myself.  And I know why.  Cameron made it important, subtly.

Spoiler alert:

Jake Sully is a paralyzed war veteran.  Without saying it or making such a big deal about it, he wants his legs back.  When he takes over his avatar, he runs out into the open with pure joy.  He’s laughing, yelling, and sprinting, then he takes a moment and digs his toes into the dirt.  That tiny scene was aforever moment.

At that point I was certain Sully was going to be permanently place in his avatar body.  I knew it before I watched the movie.  When it happened it was wholly satisfying like eating a warm chocolate cookie.  There were little things like the digging toes in that emphasized the need for that ending. It really speaks to how Cameron doesn’t over do things like using the technology both given to him, and invented by him.  He’s a storyteller at heart, knowing how to use little things to make certain story elements big.

I’ve experimented with that in writing myepisodes.

Trying to make something big by making it a big deal is a big big mistake.  In one of the writing seminars the teacher made fun of beginner writers when they write about the first serendipitous moment between two lovers.  Paraphrasing here:

“The world stopped as I gazed into her eyes. The ticking of my watch slowed and the flakes of the first snowfall hung in the air.  The hustle of the streets silenced and I felt my heartbeat yearn to feel hers.”

I must admit, when I first heard that I wanted to rush to my manuscript and make sure I didn’t do something similar.

The whole point here is that James Cameron played it well when he told his story.  I didn’t feel overwhelmed by the technology.  I didn’t feel overwhelmed by the directing.  Another words, I didn’t feel his hands in the movie (an example would be the first three episodes of Star Wars).  The actors were awesome. For example, Sigourney Weaver’s character as the dedicated scientist didn’t play up to stereotype.  Sam Worthington’s performance as Jake Sully felt relaxed, which contrasted well to his avatar character (nicely done, communicating a message).  There was a scene where he watched his brother’s cremation, which felt false.  But at least it wasn’t forced like having flashbacks.  And it was OK being false, since it was a small scene, despite requiring to be emotionally heavy.

Avatar is what storytelling should be like, whether computer imaging is involved or not.  I left the theater totally uplifted and inspired and still feel the same as I type these words.  I can’t wait for the sequels.

In my years of guiding people in their lives, I’ve learned there are two kinds of lessons.  One learned without experience and one by experience-the hard way.  Noshee in myepisodeslearned many lessons by experience.  My whole book is about lessons learned the hard way.

Which way is better?

Let’s ask a question.  Does getting hit by a car feel good?  I can tell you by experience it doesn’t.  But if I wanted to teach someone this, would I plow through them with my car?

Maybe.

For most people they don’t need to be hit by a car to know it’ll hurt.  I guess, I wasn’t one of those.

I was talking to friends, a mother and father, who have a daughter.  She’s been dating this boy who doesn’t treat her well.  I can’t go into detail but he’s abusive.  By his behavior he’s possessive, needy and manipulative.  I know this because I was once possessive, needy and manipulating.  It takes one to know one.

My friends want their daughter to rid of this boy for good reason.  They talked to their daughter on numerous occasions, but she’s become codependent.  In her case, the codependence comes from a lack of self-worth, despite her confident facade.  And it’s sad because my friends feel helpless to do anything.  In listening to their conversations I know the daughter has to learn this lesson the hard way.  The lesson that she deserves to be treated with much more respect, the lesson that she deserves someone who’ll truly love her, the lesson that she deserves her independence.

Just as I had to learn that my behavior of possession, neediness, and manipulation wasn’t healthy for the women I dated, it was unhealthy for me as a human being.

For those who think the parents should force separation, let’s look at the bigger picture.

If they were succesful in permanently separating the couple, they would alleviate the immediate situation.  But will the daughter have learned the lesson of self-worth that she deserves better?  That her relationship is unhealthy?  No.  How do I know this?  Because humans repeat their behavior until lessons are learned.  And lessons are learned only if the person is ready to change.  It’s obvious to me the daughter isn’t ready for that.

When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.

Not only will she repeat the behavior, she may enter another relationship that is even worse.  Once she learns this lesson, she’ll be able to identify future relationships that won’t be good for her, no matter how good they appear on paper.

She’s also an actress.  In the future, a role may be given to her.  A role in which the female character went through something similar.  And she nails the audition because she knows exactly what the character is experiencing.  And this role may catapult her career.  Where without this experience she may not get the role.

This experience can also lead to the man, her ‘soul’ mate.  Again, without going through the hard lesson, she may not see herself deserving someone so great and overlook him.  There are infinite possibilities.

Sometimes, lessons must be learned by experience.