I was watching TV and saw a commercial for a Nerf sword. “Ooh,” I said.

My friend who saw my reaction said,“How old are you?“

What does that matter?

The lead character of my book has defied age and experience.  Part of moving up the military echelon requires the dueling of more experienced, higher ranking warriors.  Being a tenderwing, a term used for a child or inexperience, the hero never let that get in his way.  Not that he wasn’t intimidated or ever scared.  But his father taught him that whatever you think you are.  Therefore, he never thought about his inexperience.  He only focused on his skills.

In Eastern philosophy any change must start from the inside, in particular the mind.  It’s the mind that leads and the body must follow.  Think about this.  You’re thirsty.  Your mind commands your hand to pick up that beer.  Then it commands your arm to bring that frosty drink to your mouth, etc.

So why is it when both men and women want to look younger do they start from the outside?  Worse yet, they don’t even go to the inside.  Women tend to use more make up, wear their daughter’s clothes.  Men date younger women, drive expensive sport cars.  None communicates youth but communicates, “I’M STILL YOUNG DAMMIT!”

My excitement of the Nerf sword was truly my excitement for a kid’s toy.  Inside I feel young as if I was still twelve.  I love to play.  I love fun.  I wonder about our world and ask questions every day.  Isn’t that what kids do?

“Why is the sky blue?”

“Why does that fat man eat so much?”

“Where do babies come from?”

“Why were you praying to dad last night?”

At first I thought my immaturity was my rebelling against growing up.  But the things I’ve accomplished in my life have required the maturity of an adult.  I just go back to playing whenever I can.  Most of nature is this way.  Lions lounge around all day, except when it’s time to hunt and eat.  Dog’s love to play ball, have their ears scratched, their bellies rubbed.  Dolphins leap into the air cause it’s fun.  Why else would they do it?  It doesn’t serve any other purpose.

Every day take a moment to have a little fun, or a lot.  It may serve a purpose, but definitely doesn’t have to.

Have fun.  Have the wonderment of children.

The hero of the 7th Province has a choice.  He either rebels against his close friend and former mentor, or join him in taking over the world.  Each choice ends in war.  That’s a tough place to be.  Is there a correct choice?  For the hero I’m not sure.  As a writer, the choices that each character makes, ultimately mine, is a crap shoot.

I love that.

Even though I’ve plotted my whole novel, each day I wrote brought new discoveries and challenges that made me giddy.  I’m never sure how things were to happen.  I just know they had to happen.  As a result, writing my fantasy was a huge adventure.

Is rebelling bad?

I have a secret.  It’s one of my favorite things about myself.  I don’t get along well with authority figures.  That doesn’t bode well since my day job is encrusted in a corporate empire.  The funny thing is they have a lot of propaganda that emphasizes their business values.  I won’t get into the hypocrisy of it.

Is rebelling not a good thing?

A parent tells a child to kiss Uncle Louie.  Child scrunches her little face and shakes her head.  Parents eggs the child on, saying Uncle Louie loves the child.  Child pouts her lips, turns, runs toward her parent’s leg, and grasps with all her might.  Parent gets upset, unhinges the child, pushes her to Uncle Louie, and forces her to kiss him on the cheek.  (I credit this example to my best friend.)

Is this wrong?

Hell yeah.

The parent just took the child’s power away, forced her to kiss a strange man, despite her not wanting to.  If Uncle Louie were a child molester, the parent just punched a large hole in the child’s ability to resist the attack.  In the child’s mind love is associated with force.  And we wonder why some women stay with men who batter them.

What if the child was just being a brat?

Firm discipline should take place.  You decide what firm is.  That’s different in each culture, society, family and individual.  But in the example above, the child is not being a brat.

Teaching a lot of adolescent kids made me realize one thing.  Almost every single one exerts their own independence.  Every parent exerts their control in an attempt to guide them.  It’s the nature of the ocean, the ebb and flow.  Parents think their kids are being a pain in the ass.  Offsprings think their parents are being assholes.  What more could you ask for in a relationship?

Think of a pendulum searching for their own center.

Parents often ask me to infect a behavioral change.  But that’s an impossible task.  All I can do is mentor them without limitation.  Tom Cruise taught me that.

He was on Inside the Actor’s Studio.  A great show by the way.  He said that his mother never limited him in what he did.  She was watchful, but allowed him to explore the world.  Now he’s some actor making at least twenty million dollars per movie, chump change.

As you sit in your day job, and if it’s not the place you want to be, then what are you doing about it?

See part 1 to this article.